Tuesday, September 13, 2016

That time I got "friend-zoned"...

...by my goddaughter, G-Baby #1, London Danielle. 

Here's a quick story about being persistent and consistent.

In January 2015, my bff and her family came back to The States for good. London was 5 months at the time. Between wanting to hang my bff, and wanting my g-baby to know me, I started visiting them on a weekly basis. 

The first day I saw them after their return, we took a trip to Babies R Us. London and I had a stare-down in the store. Right then I knew, it would take a while for her to get used to me. I never forced her to try to like me. I would go for a hi-5 and she would just stare. I'd say "OK" and keep it moving. LOL Babies can be selective with who they can stand to be around, just like adults. Kids are people too. So, I respected her space. 

However, slowly but surely, the stare-down period at the beginning of each visit began to get shorter and shorter until it no longer existed. She started warming up to me. She finally gave me a hi-5. Then we started doing our little handshake, with a couple of twists SHE added to the end of it. Then she started hugging me when I would come thru the door if I asked for one. Then the "Danielle selfies" on my phone started to add up.

"Cheesy face!"
"Silly face!"
"Serious face!"

Then she hugged me as I was about to leave one day, wouldn't let me go, so I stayed for a few more HOURS. Then she started drinking out of MY water bottle. Then I had make sure to wear comfortable clothes when I'd go visit because I knew she'd have me on the floor playing with her toys (The blocks and turntable are my fave. What? Don't judge.). Then she learned how to say my name ("Keya!"). Then we took a trip to Party City, to get bubbles and listen to Beyonce's "Freedom." Our first solo outing.

And now she has her mom to call me while I'm at work. And she lets me know when she "go pee pee in the potty."

Yesterday, I told her mom that I was content with her never liking me. I thought she'd never warm up to me. 

Look at us now! I climbed out the "friend-zone" and became family.

Her little brother, though? At 4 months, he has already warmed up to me. Only a matter of time before London and I teach him how to "bust shots" like we're on stage with Rihanna while she performs "Work."

If London knows how to do it (which, according to her mom, is my fault *clutches pearls*), Landon must know, as well.

BLOP!!! BLOP!!! BLOP!!!

K to the...

Wednesday, September 7, 2016

Bifcake Chronicles: Hustlin backwards

After almost 3 months of being superficial and 1 date, I decided to delete my tinder account.



And we are in what is known as "cuffing season."

Ya girl is outcheah hustling backwards like a maug. 

I've learned from Tinder that to be "successful" with online dating, you have to really commit to it. Commit to finding possible matches. Commit to checking to see if you've matched with anyone. Then, commit to maintaining communication with your matches to see if they are worth your time.

After a week of that type of commitment, I'm over it. Then, the app sits dormant for about 3 weeks before I go "Oh...I'm not doing anything right now. Let me swipe."

Nah.

I've also learned there are way more "self-employed," "world-traveling" men out there in their 30s and 40s that have been schooled in "the streetz" than I may have originally thought. o_O

Thanks for the side-eye practice and giggles, Tinder.

K to the...