#BARS: Rapid Refund Edition

Today's post is number 100 on Fantastical Randomocity!  *throws 100-shaped confetti*  I don't know if this is significant or not...but we'll just keep the party going.

Now, don't quote me on this, but it is a scientific fact that Instant messenger programs were invented SOLELY to maintain one's sanity.  Aside from maintaining sanity, these programs also help start rap careers...that need not exist.  Check out the G-chat freestyle battle between two Sagittarians, MC It's My Grant (myself) and MC Where's My Refund Check (Jordan) [Also seen on Tumblr].

*after a discussion about our wack income tax refunds for 2011*

MCIMG: gonna be a good year...I ain't talking about a tire/Jim Carrey crazy...no "Liar, Liar"
MCWMRC: *passes u the mic* go get em
MCIMG: yo, yo...check it
progression, regression, recession, great depression
Super Bowl Sunday, who gon' throw an interception
MCWMRC: got an erection from the 08 election
no one showed affection, so much deception
I should be a Decepticon
mad my hairline mirrors Lebron's
MCIMG: That cul de sac hairline, word to Bron Bron
RIP to Cortez Cornelius, first name Don
MCWMRC: So I...witnessed KD In the Maxima
can I take u on a date is what I'm asking ya
she declined smoother than a babys ass
shoulda had better game with my lazy ass
tried to play for her heart, no love and basketball
bored expression on her face, I shouldn't have asked at all
but my button up was crispy
and no creases in my J's so how the f*** could she diss me?
LOL *passes mic*
MCIMG: *looks at ground and nods head* *notices dirt on boots* *wipes them off* *goes back to nodding*
Mara Hruby in my earphones, as I groove to the beat
no red leather jacket on, so the It, I can't Beat
Tryna regain composure after Jordan committed freestyle murder
"I'M SO HAPPY TO BE HEAH" like the African goat herder
But he wasn't a goat herder, he was a prince, Akeem
20 years later, Houston got the dream, HAKEEEEEM
*drops mic shakes left tit*

*pause for the cause, discusses freestyling in Vegas, on the strip, while inebriated (LOL), then...*

MCWMRC: spit in front of the Bellagio
lyrics drippin from our lips like a popsicle
damn I just drew a blank lol
MCIMG: hahahahha it rhymed, though
you good son...keep going!
MCWMRC: bring the beat back
uh uh
MCIMG: *lights candle*
LOL that was so random
MCWMRC: Lights candle? must be a vigil.
spittin in a cypher, one person in the middle.
*balls paper up* got damn it
*passes mic* lemme get my train of thought
MCIMG: You aight, son, we all draw blanks
it could be worse, you could be walking a plank
I can't swim, they say black people don't like water
but they like Joe Budden, who be in the House that be Slaughtered
MCWMRC: uhn! RAWSE
MCIMG: *strokes imaginary beard*

We show you how to do this, son!

K to the...

Random Rumblings

• Happy Valentine's Day! :-D
• No, I don't have a Valentine. 
• When I first started this blog, I was posting multiple times a week.  Then I joined Twitter on 9/26/09, and different things I could have written about were tweeted.  Then Tumblr came along and I truly neglected my first-born, Fantastical Randomocity.  So, now I'm trying to regain her trust again.  *caresses the blog*
• I deleted my Tumblr page.  I really wish there was a way I could have saved all of my original thoughts on there.  Maybe 30% of my posts were original thoughts; the rest was me reblogging pics or other folk's thoughts.  So, some of my Tumblr posts will be rehashed on here.
• My grandmother hates all things Internet, especially Twitter.  So, she gave me some advice a few months back: WRITE IT DOWN!  Because of this, I keep a small notebook in my "everyday bag".  I haven't written in it, yet. A lot of the time, music takes away whatever is bothering me...or I talk to myself or God.
• I don't like to be informed of when someone is tweeting mess about me.  If I'm not mentioned in a tweet about me, by someone I don't follow, then it's not meant for me to see.  It has only happened once in my new year.  I'd like for that to be the first and last time.
• Having personal business (whether true or false) on the Internet sucks.
• Being able to block folk from texting or calling you is a great.  Thanks, Sprint!  Now, if they can block folk from showing up at my door, unexpectedly...
• I love my new tat.  The location is risque for me, but the words are a reminder that needs to be easily seen by me.
• I've officially gone down one size in my jeans.
• RIP Whitney Houston.  I still can't believe it. 

K to the...

So, yesterday...

Yeah, three blogposts in the past week.  Just let it ride, mmkay?

So, I don't have to say what yesterday was.  Even my unborn child knew what yesterday was.  But because of what yesterday was, we were treated to some very interesting commercials...yesterday.   I wasn't too impressed with the commercials, but there were three that stuck out that had me with the gigglefits.  See my top 3 commercials that were shown because of what yesterday was.  ;-)

#3

#2

#1

Who run the world? BIRDS!

As a kid, in science class, I was told birds fly south for the winter. With my imagination, I pictured the birds flying to Florida hanging with their bird-cousins and having a grand ole time. Then, March hits, and they make their way back to the Chi.

Then, I grew up and realized that maybe I was told wrong.  Maybe the birds do not fly south.  If they did, I wouldn't have poop stains on my Bentley car during the winter months.  Maybe my teacher meant they fly to the South Side for winter.  Yeah, that's it.

So, I accepted the fact that all birds do not fly south for the winter. Just take a stroll down Wabash in downtown Chicago and you'll see a flock of ratchet auss pigeons looking for food, or just strolling down the street like it's nothing. 

Because these rat bastards do not fly south for the winter, they seek heat just like humans. This means taking over the heating lamps on a CTA platform.



Obviously, their feathers aren't enough to keep them warm.

Sometimes, it's just 2 pigeons; sometimes it's a waka flock of them!  Ever since I had lunch one day outside and a pigeon was 6 inches away from my french fries, I stay away from them.  I find a "safe spot" off to the side, like the lady in the pic, and stand there.  I don't bother the pigeons...and they don't bother me.

I'm at least 130 lbs heavier than these bastards.  But I'm the one that has to show them respect?  I see who run things around heah! 

K to the...

Grown-up life: Overrated

What up! How's the new year treating folk, so far? I hope it's well. I'm on month two of my new year and it's not so bad. Been doing a lot of reflecting; especially on my employment situation and where I lay my head at night. Let me be honest, right now. [Not that I've been lying the previous 98 blog posts. I'm just being dramatical. ;-)] There were three main reasons I moved to Hammond, Indiana: To be closer to the beau, to be closer to the gym I frequent and love, and it's cheaper. Now that I'm single, folk might read the first reason in the previous sentence and judge me. To you I say this: So the hell what!

Anywho, the cost of everything is steady increasing, yet my pay is the same. So what does this mean?

*2Chainz voice* CUTBAAACKS!

I had to decide which monthly expenses I have could be decreased or eliminated. Then, Comcast went and charged me $1.99 for downgrading my plan, without telling me. So, Comcast was the lucky winner. I cancelled Comcast, signed up for Netflix, got AT&T Internet, and I'm saving a good $135 a month.

Schwag!

I'm trying to cut costs as much as I can because I don't wanna move back into the city; not with my current salary.  Maybe the suburbs; but not the city.  Would you be in a rush to go back to 10.25% sales tax on everything after living in a place where sales tax is 7% and there is no sales tax on food?  I didn't think so. 

K to the...

Man plans, God laughs

Happy New Year!  I know you're thinking "It's not even Christmas, yet!"  I know.  But, for me, the new year doesn't start on January 1st; it starts on December 4th, the day I was born.  I am 20 days into the new year...the last year of my 20s!  And I must say for this year, my mindset on life has changed drastically due to last year's events.

I'm sure all 4 of my readers have that one song that is their jam that they can listen to on repeat.   Then, something happens in your life, and all of a sudden, that song sounds so different.  The words haven't changed...the beat is still the same...but whatever you went through makes you relate more to what the artist is saying in the song.  That's how I feel about "Laughing At Your Plans" by The Foreign Exchange.

From the moment we were little, we all made plans.  We planned on what we'll be when we grow up...to who and when we'll be married.   Then we lived life.  And life didn't give not-a-one damn about your plans.

That's where I am right now.  I made plans for life after undergrad.  And while certain plans weren't carried out, other great things happened in my life.  Like, straight awesomeness that wasn't planned!  But last year's plans not being carried out really hit me...hard.  It left me angry, hurt and depressed and thought I'd never recover.  Now, I'm at the point where I stopped making definite plans for my life.  I'm not out here living as if I don't have any responsibilities...or looking like a lost soul.  But you won't see me with any "To Do Before I Turn [insert age]" lists.*  There are some things that I'd like to do or goals I'd like to accomplish before I die, but if it's not meant to be, I can't force it.  I want God to laugh at my jokes...not at my plans.

So, I'm enjoying the now...and remembering to just let it be.

Happy New Year!

K to the...

*I'm not knocking anyone who does this.  Just speaking for myself.

Courtesy to whom!?

Assuming all 4 of my readers are adults, I’m sure you all are aware of the prevalence of germs that are in the bathroom. And I’m sure you all are aware that it’s better to flush the toilet when the lid is down. In case you don’t believe me, WebMD.com says:

According to Charles Gerba, PhD, PhD, a professor of microbiology at University of Arizona in Tucson, flushing the toilet with the lid up is not wise. "Polluted water vapor erupts out of the flushing toilet bowl and it can take several hours for these particles to finally settle -- not to mention where," he says. "If you have your toothbrush too close to the toilet, you are brushing your teeth with what's in your toilet."

Again, assuming all 4 of my readers are adults, I’m sure you all are knowledgeable of the public act of "The Courtesy Flush.”  In case you’re not, urbandictionary.com says:

A flush done in the middle of doing your business to either A) reduce the smell or B) reduce the chances or clogging the toilet.

Stay with me here.

Remember, Dr. Gerba said “polluted water vapor erupts out of the flushing toilet bowl,” and the lid should be closed when flushing the toilet.

You with me?

When you’re giving a courtesy flush, you’re sitting on the toilet, right?

So what does this mean?

The bacteria from the toilet is shooting up in my…

Wait, whaaaat?

So, when nature calls while I'm out and about, am I putting my Nina at risk for the courtesy of strangers? 

I need to rethink this.

K to the...