Bifcake Chronicles: Will There Be One?

If you are friends with me on social media, you will notice there are certain friends with whom I spend the majority of my time. There are six of us in the Chicagoland area, including my g-babies’ auntie,  and a friend who stays in Florida. Amongst the six of us here, two are married, one is getting married in the Fall, another is in the process of being a homeowner with her beau, and another one is in the process of no longer describing her relationship as “long-distance.”

None of the ladies in the previous, long-ass sentence describes yours truly.

Womp.

The one who is moving away (DJ) has been my rider. Because her beau doesn’t reside here and she doesn’t have kids, she can just get up and go when an idea pops up in either of our heads. But with her leaving, who will be the person I can call on when I just want to get up and go? As an introvert, I have no problem doing things by myself. But sometimes, I want someone I know to roll with me, ya know?

While walking back to the car after a museum visit and some good grubbing, I told DJ that I need someone I can hang with. If there is an adult night and the husbands/beaus/and soon-to-be wife are around, I want to have someone to roll with me so I’m not looking like the nth wheel AGAIN. I want to take a walk downtown and just enjoy the city; or eat some fancy shmancy food at a place I've never been (he doesn't have to pay - we can split the bill); or go to the movies to check out that new [insert Director's name here] movie; or simply chill at the lakefront.

Basically, I just want some company.

Will there be one?

K to the…

The Only Thing Constant...

Right now, as I type this, I am soooooooo content with the person that I am. You might be reading this and thinking "You shouldn't be content. Strive to be better." And to you, I say "I'm a yogi. Chill." As someone who practices yoga, I like to enjoy the present. If I am constantly looking to the future, I could miss out on the good that is going on now. I strive to be better, no doubt. But right now, I am loving who I am. I am loving Kenya.

"If you compare yourself with others,
you may become vain and bitter;
for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself.
Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans."

-Max Ehrmann "Desiderata"

Friday evening, I had an appointment with CarMax to get my car appraised. I was curious to see how much my '08 G6 was worth. I had no idea I'd be leaving CarMax with a '14 jawn in a color that has become my power color since turning 30 - RED! Since my very first car, a '96 Maxima, I've always had JUKBX on my license plates. With this car, that will not be the case. It's crazy, to me, that I even typed that. Jukebox was a college nickname due to me always dancing and playing music. Don't get me wrong...I still do that! I just want something else.

This year has definitely been a year of change. It was time for me to move back into the city. It was time for me to speak up (more) for myself. It was time for me to be more confident in my field of work due to my experience. It was time for me to let some people go. It was time for me to live it up at Caribana this year. It was time for me to be comfortable with my body and rock that crop top and short shorts with no fear. It was time for me to get a new(er) car. It was just time.

Y'all know all these changes have given me an idea for my next tattoo, right? And I want it in an area that could be visible all year round, depending on the type of shirt I am wearing. Yes, that shall be the move in 2017, the year I turn 35.

THIRTY-FIVE!!!

HOLY SCHITT!!!!

K to the...

Tre'd up.

The day before my birthday, I received a call from my doctor's office with lab results. A week prior, I went in for my annual physical. I learned that I have a Vitamin D deficiency, which can be remedied by simply taking vitamins. I hate taking pills...seriously. But, it's something that has to be done. I also learned that my mom does the same, so it's hereditary. Yay, genes! 

While reading up on symptoms of Vitamin D deficiency, I began to figure out what was going on with me in the past few months. Symptoms of Vitamin D deficiency include aching joints and feeling "blue." For the past 3-4 months, this is what I had been experiencing. 

My right knee was bothering me in ways it's never bothered me before. I've been playing since I was 8, and the only knee problems I've ever had was "jumpers' knee." But, yoga wasn't helping with the aches I had in my knee. I initially thought my body was in shock after picking up this new hobby of running. So after the Hot Chocolate 5K, I went from running 3x a week to only once a week.

Also, I felt like I hadn't been myself the past few months. I initially thought I was suffering from Seasonal Affective Disorder. When the sun was out, I was fine. But, it just seemed like there were more cloudy days than sunny days. It was like I was in a constant state of "blah".

When something makes me upset, I acknowledge that I'm upset, and then say to myself "OK, what are you going to do about it? Dwell on it, or change your mood?" It seemed like the pep talk wasn't working for me. Was I depressed? It's possible. But I do know ever since I've returned from vacation, my mood has gotten so much better. I started taking the Vitamin D supplement while on vacay. Monday, I came home and practiced yoga for an hour after work. I hadn't done that since July or August. And I slept peacefully, like I've always done after an evening yoga practice.

My vacation in New Orleans, along with my doctor letting me know what was going on with me was right on time. I feel like I'm getting back to myself. I really enjoyed my trip and really appreciate my peoples for hanging with me. 

The homies after dinner at Superior Seafood

Chillin' on Bourbon Street

Good times as the clock struck midnight on 12/4

 

Self-explanatory

K to the...

"Tell Diamond to get her funky ass on stage..."

This year, I popped my "strip club cherry" while I was Jacksonville, FL for America's birthday weekend. I came in with $50 in singles, and proudly left out with none of those singles.

Men, I get it.

I get it.

These women in Jacksonville were so hospitable, hugging and thanking us after they got off the stage. Seriously, I was impressed. Not only were they flexible, and smelled heavenly, but the tricks on the pole were what got me.

Yes, please...take all my singles.

All at once.

There was one who just blew my mind. Her name was Brittany (I don't know if this is the correct spelling; wasn't like there was a scrolling marquee. Or maybe it was, but I was just so amazed by what was going on...). Now, Brittany was called to the stage multiple times. When she finally got on stage and got on that pole, she worked that pole with so much attitude. Like "Let me give these people what they want so I can get back to my game of '2048' on my phone."

Now, when Brittany came on stage, I was out of singles (LOL) but my girls would pass me a few to give to the ladies since I was standing up.

At one point, Brittany gets off the pole; showing her flexibility, patting her pum pum...working for those dollars. She lays down, places both ankles behind her head, calmly folds a dollar bill length-wise and places it over her vagina opening.

"What is she about to do?"

*dollar bill floats up into the air*

"HOLY SHIT!!! That's it! We can leave!!!"

Thank you Jacksonville. Thank you Mascaras. And most importantly, thank you Brittany!

K to the...

What year is it?

I'm back to taking the train to work, so I have a lot of time to just stare out the window and let my thoughts flow. I was recently thinking about aging and #nshit, since the birthday is approaching. I usually start to get excited for the birthday around Thanksgiving. This year the birthday is exactly a week after Thanksgiving. Thanks, Pope George XII!

Sidenote: My original due date was November 17th. I was born on December 4th. That is one helluva delay!!! HOV! <>

Anywho, a high thought came to me while sober. Though I haven't officially turned 32 yet, I am currently in the 32nd year of my life.

I swear I was sober when this came to mind. Stay with me here.

They sell stickers so you can take pics of your baby when they hit their monthly milestones up until their 12th month on Earth. These pics are documenting, what? Your baby's first year on Earth. After they hit the one year mark, they are on to their 2nd year of life.

The reason I bring this up because whenever something good has happened in the past 11 1/2 months, I've said "Year 31 is showing out!" or something to that effect.

But really...it's Year 32.

Or is it?

Well, I barely look legal...so, whatever!

K to the...

15 weeks

On October 21, 2010, I wrote this letter during a blog challenge:

Dear HugMaNeck,

During the twenty plus years of friendship, we have watched each other grow from 1st graders to grown auss women. We have watched each other's younger sibling grow into beautiful young women. Now, it's almost that time to watch some of our own seeds grow to beautiful young women or handsome young men. With that said, I expect my god child to be conceived by 2012. Put the shut to the up...the sperm to the egg...and make it happen.

Love, Hug My Neck

P.S. Don't worry about when you'll get your godchild. This is about me and MY needs wants. lol

On December 31, 2013, this woman selfishly called me at work and told me she was pregnant. I say she's selfish because she knew damn well I couldn't scream like I wanted to while at work. I cried tears of unspeakable joy. Tiff and I had talked about babies while growing up. My girls and I made a list of the order in which we'd have babies. I told her that I thought Baby Love will arrive in late 2014.

And it's happening. For real! And, I'm excited as hell! She will be the 2nd mommy in our crew...giving birth to a Virgo.

Like Beyonce.

EEEEEeeeeeek!

As of today, my bff is 15 weeks pregnant. She'll be home in a couple of months so I'll get to see the belly in person.

I'll probably cry.

Again.

And then put headphones on her belly and play some Michael Jackson for Peanut (My nickname for the baby.)

*swoons*

K to the...

Randomocity - 2.11.14

Written last night, hence "2.11.14" in the title, and not today's date. Enjoy! 

• I honestly forgot about Valentine's Day approaching.
• February is the beginning of the baby boom for my crew.
• Yes. Yes, I am rocking crop tops this summer thanks to this tattoo.
• Sometimes when conversing with my mom, she gives me this look...of admiration. Like she's proud of the woman she raised; or she's seeing how though I'm a grown-up, I'm still her baby. I look forward to the day I can look at my child the way my mom looks at me. 
• I love my body...even my slightly knocked knees.
• My grandmother can't remember what she had for breakfast, but oddly remembers a conversation I had about me moving almost a month ago. The human brain is such an interesting organ.  
• The city of Hammond...the county of Lake...the state of Indiana does not believe in salting and properly plowing the streets. It really unpeels my banana, son.
• I miss working downtown. I'm working on getting back there.
• I'm over winter.
• New Orleans...I miss you!
• Toronto...here I come!
• "Now I know how to love somebody/I've learned love is out there for me/There's no way that love forgot/Love won't leave me out."
• Thinking of retiring the "JUKBX" license plate. 
• Yes, having an FWB* can be fun. But that ish gets boring...because it's just sex. I don't want anything more from you...boriiiiiinnnnnng.
• Or is it just me?
• Want to know if a guy who claims to be interested in you is on that shullbit? Ask a male friend. 
• I love how my friends look forward to what has turned into an annual summer party at my crib. But last summer's party was so epic...I don't know if that can be topped. We kicked it from 10p - 4a. My patio was a mess. I had to shampoo my carpet.  

Because, I care.

• I love my team.
• I need my couch reupholstered.
• That wasn't a euphemism. 
• I said I wouldn't give up on Jhene Aiko...and I didn't. She has really grown on me.
• The CFO thanked me for my work on the annual compliance audit at the gig. There were no issues in the audit report that was presented to the audit committee today. It meant a lot to me coming from him.
• December 18, 2014 marks 10 years since I graduated from undergrad. Yikes!
• RIP Whitney Houston

K to the...

*"Friend With Benefits"