That time I got "friend-zoned"...

...by my goddaughter, G-Baby #1, London Danielle. 

Here's a quick story about being persistent and consistent.

In January 2015, my bff and her family came back to The States for good. London was 5 months at the time. Between wanting to hang my bff, and wanting my g-baby to know me, I started visiting them on a weekly basis. 

The first day I saw them after their return, we took a trip to Babies R Us. London and I had a stare-down in the store. Right then I knew, it would take a while for her to get used to me. I never forced her to try to like me. I would go for a hi-5 and she would just stare. I'd say "OK" and keep it moving. LOL Babies can be selective with who they can stand to be around, just like adults. Kids are people too. So, I respected her space. 

However, slowly but surely, the stare-down period at the beginning of each visit began to get shorter and shorter until it no longer existed. She started warming up to me. She finally gave me a hi-5. Then we started doing our little handshake, with a couple of twists SHE added to the end of it. Then she started hugging me when I would come thru the door if I asked for one. Then the "Danielle selfies" on my phone started to add up.

"Cheesy face!"

"Silly face!"

"Serious face!"

Then she hugged me as I was about to leave one day, wouldn't let me go, so I stayed for a few more HOURS. Then she started drinking out of MY water bottle. Then I had make sure to wear comfortable clothes when I'd go visit because I knew she'd have me on the floor playing with her toys (The blocks and turntable are my fave. What? Don't judge.). Then she learned how to say my name ("Keya!"). Then we took a trip to Party City, to get bubbles and listen to Beyonce's "Freedom." Our first solo outing.

And now she has her mom to call me while I'm at work. And she lets me know when she "go pee pee in the potty."

Yesterday, I told her mom that I was content with her never liking me. I thought she'd never warm up to me. 

Look at us now! I climbed out the "friend-zone" and became family.

Her little brother, though? At 4 months, he has already warmed up to me. Only a matter of time before London and I teach him how to "bust shots" like we're on stage with Rihanna while she performs "Work."

If London knows how to do it (which, according to her mom, is my fault *clutches pearls*), Landon must know, as well.

BLOP!!! BLOP!!! BLOP!!!

K to the...

"You Can Feel It All Over..."

Last Friday, my mom and I had the pleasure of watching Stevland Hardaway Morris aka Stevie Wonder perform the entire "Songs in the Key of Life" album, including "A Something's Extra" EP and other hits, while he was in Chicago. We jammed for nearly 3 1/2 hours.

In addition to a full band, including Nate on bass (listed in album credits), a bad ass horn section and background singers, Stevie had a full strings section from a local Chicago orchestra.

STRINGS!!!

LISTEN!!!

I played trumpet in high school for two years until my schedule forced me to choose between band and basketball. Needless to say, the horn section holds a special place in my heart. However, the strings...it's something about the strings that just makes a song sound so beautiful. I found myself looking forward to the next time the orchestra was accompanying Stevie's band.

I'm an all day sucker for live instrumentation, yo.

When Stevie was performing, "Ngicuela - Es Una Historia - I Am Singing", he was playing an instrument that I had NEVER seen before. Video was zoomed in on his hands so you can see him play this instrument and I immediately went "WTH is that?!" I searched online for two days trying to find out the name - harpejji. It was developed back in 2007, and Stevie was playing it like he'd been playing the instrument since his first album dropped.

Musical. Genius.

And possibly a psychic.

He told us that he wrote "Isn't She Lovely" before knowing the sex of his first child. He knew he was having a girl, and her name would be Aisha. I need him to holla at my bff and let her know if g-baby is having a little bro or sis.

Besides simply being in awe that I was watching a genius at work, other thoughts came to mind while watching him:

1. Is he visiting a doctor on a regular basis? We gotta keep him alive. He can't die.
2. He has to have, at the most, 30 locs left. He's draping, though.
3. How'd he know that girl's dress is red?*
4. *said multiple times* He is walking by himself. He can see. Playing us since 1950.**

Stevie stated the current tour was the last time he'd be performing the album live in the U.S.. I am so glad I was able to see him. Dozens and dozens of roses for a true legend...icon...genius.

K to the...

*I know someone told him
**I know he was counting steps

"Keep ya heart, 3 Stacks..."

A couple of months ago, there was one guy on my radar with whom I would get in a relationship if he asked. Seriously. I asked on some "YOLO" steez if he wanted to go to Jamaica together for NYE. I really didn't want to be in Chicago for NYE. We are not going on the trip, due to circumstances that were beyond both of our control. And I'm OK with that. I do think us not going on the trip is a sign.

A sign for what?

After thinking about my last relationship, then when I re-dated someone last year after 10 years of sporadic communication, I've realized that I have to stop being so reckless with my heart. I have to get off that "Let's just do it...what do we have to lose" steez. I can't, and really don't feel like, dealing with another heartache due to some hastiness on mine and the other guy's behalf.

Nawl.

I know I'm not getting any younger, as I age like the finest Cabernet Sauvignon from Villa Sceriman winery (I need to figure when I'm going to drink this bottle I've been saving). But I damn sure don't have to rush into anything, or settle. I still have a few years before I give up on giving my G-babymama a G-baby of her own.

So what now? Just continuing to live, love myself, and Euro-step the bullshit thrown my way.

"Play your part, play your part."

K to the...

Hey June!

Seems like I was just maxing some Beggar's Pizza while sipping the finest Cabernet Sauvignon while waiting for 2015 to arrive. Look at us now...almost halfway through the year.

I'm officially out of hibernation due to warm weather showing up in Chicago, and having only two classes left until I am certified to teach yoga.

Less than a week after I am done with my classes, I will be on the beach, working on abandoning my light-skinned sisteren and brethren for a few months. I haven't been on a vacation since Italy last September. So this trip, and suntan is long overdue.

A year ago, I was falling in love with someone. Today, I'm falling more in love with myself. Flaws and all.

And my locs are growing.

Post shampoo...pre shrinkage.

Ya bish!

K to the...

Bliss

I've had some great birthdays, but something about yesterday's birthday was different. It was more than joy...yesterday was full of bliss. From the moment I woke up till I went to sleep.

Like I've stated before, this certification program has made me more aware of what's going on around me. When in undergrad, I made plans up to the age of 30. Here I am at age 32 and none of the shit I planned in undergrad has come to fruition. But my life has still been so gat damn dope due to other unplanned occurrences. Through all the heartbreak, a quarter-life crisis (oh, it's real!), stupid decisions...I am still here. That thought crossed my mind yesterday morning and tears flowed.

Here's to another year of dopeness!

K to the...

Nike loves Chicago

On August 14th thru 16th, Nike held the World Basketball Festival in my city, Chi-City. This festival wasn't on the north side; it wasn't downtown. No, this festival was held on the best side of the city...the south side, at the 63rd street beach.

Of course I had to throw on the #8. 

I didn't know what to expect at the festival; I just knew I had to go. I checked out the Tournament of Champions, watching some of the best in the Chi play against some of the best in NYC. I saw hella Chi-town basketball legends. Current NBA players, retired NBA players, and plenty of movers and shakers of the city.

But the highlight for me was the exhibit that gave a history of Nike basketball shoes. From the very first pair of basketball shoes made by Nike, to Forces, to Flights, To Jordans, to Lebrons, to Kevin Durant's...I wish I would have taken pictures of everything. What was so dope about the exhibit was how it was customized for Chicago. When I saw pics of two parks I've frequented as a kid and adult, I couldn't help but to smile.

Seeing these pics took me back to when I first started playing basketball. I didn't even have proper basketball attire, but I was in the alleys on the milk crate trying to establish my game; pretending to be Scottie Pippen in a game we made up called "The Passing Game." When we got older and were able to ride to the parks, we'd go to Avalon, Cole or Tuley Park; wherever we could find a pick-up game. Then, as an adult, I was at Cole, and then 63rd & Hayes when I moved to the South Shore area. Some people got their suntans at the beach. I got mine on the basketball court.

I truly do love this game of basketball. I'm sitting here typing right now with my left forearm on fire after it caught a serious elbow this morning. I don't know. Maybe it's not meant for me to wear heels until I'm 75 like my grandmother. But I do know I can't let this game go. Whether I'm playing or watching...it's in my soul. And it's nothing I can and will do to stop it.

K to the...

Music Monday - 3.17.14

It's no secret that I'm a music lover. My very first tattoo was because of my love for music. I can't help it. The older I get, the more appreciate it. It's not just the lyrics that move me, but I find myself paying more attention to the instruments. This is why I like to buy CDs because I can look at liner notes. If I buy an album from iTunes and it has a digital booklet...WIN!

Hello, my name is Kenya...and I'm a music addict.

There is an artist I've grown to appreciate more as I get older. His name is Stevland Hardaway Morris...BKA Stevie Wonder. Recently, my ears were blessed with "Songs in the Key of Life". I had read nothing but good things about this album. I was sure I had heard almost half of the songs on the album prior to me purchasing it, but I needed to hear the entire album because...Kenya.

Let me tell you. "Songs..." has been played multiple times, everyday, since I've bought it. The entire album is a beautiful piece of work. The way it flows, the lyrics, the instrumentation...LISTEN!

And it's a double album WITH bonus songs. Stevie was like "Oh, you thought I was done? Nah...here's some more."

I don't know when I'm going to stop playing this album everyday, but I do know this:

Stevland Hardaway Morris has to live forever.

K to the...

15 weeks

On October 21, 2010, I wrote this letter during a blog challenge:

Dear HugMaNeck,

During the twenty plus years of friendship, we have watched each other grow from 1st graders to grown auss women. We have watched each other's younger sibling grow into beautiful young women. Now, it's almost that time to watch some of our own seeds grow to beautiful young women or handsome young men. With that said, I expect my god child to be conceived by 2012. Put the shut to the up...the sperm to the egg...and make it happen.

Love, Hug My Neck

P.S. Don't worry about when you'll get your godchild. This is about me and MY needs wants. lol

On December 31, 2013, this woman selfishly called me at work and told me she was pregnant. I say she's selfish because she knew damn well I couldn't scream like I wanted to while at work. I cried tears of unspeakable joy. Tiff and I had talked about babies while growing up. My girls and I made a list of the order in which we'd have babies. I told her that I thought Baby Love will arrive in late 2014.

And it's happening. For real! And, I'm excited as hell! She will be the 2nd mommy in our crew...giving birth to a Virgo.

Like Beyonce.

EEEEEeeeeeek!

As of today, my bff is 15 weeks pregnant. She'll be home in a couple of months so I'll get to see the belly in person.

I'll probably cry.

Again.

And then put headphones on her belly and play some Michael Jackson for Peanut (My nickname for the baby.)

*swoons*

K to the...

Music Monday - 2.24.14

The relationship I have with The Foreign Exchange's music is similar to my relationship with Jill Scott's music. I was introduced to The Foreign Exchange via their second album "Leave It All Behind" and immediately fell in love with it.

I feel like their albums are telling a story from the first album until the last; a story to which I can relate. Below is how I interpret their albums:

• "Connected"
• Living and loving life
• Trying to find one's purpose on Earth
• -"Leave It All Behind"
• In love with someone
• Getting on each other's nerves
• Wanting to give each other the world
• May have found The One
• "Authenticity"
• The issues in the relationship are overbearing
• Downs outweigh the Ups
• Relationship ends
• "WTF happened?"
• "Love In Flying Colors"
• You worked on yourself, realizing your flaws
• Looking at the broken relationship as lesson learned, not a waste of time.
• You love life again.
• You survived
• Ready to love

So below is my personal ranking of the studio albums from The Foreign Exchange:

1. Leave It All Behind
2. Love In Flying Colors
3. Authenticity 
4. Connected.

Can't wait till I see them in May! I turned my mom into a fan, so she'll be there right along with me. :-)

Happy Monday!

K to the...

Randomocity - 2.11.14

Written last night, hence "2.11.14" in the title, and not today's date. Enjoy! 

• I honestly forgot about Valentine's Day approaching.
• February is the beginning of the baby boom for my crew.
• Yes. Yes, I am rocking crop tops this summer thanks to this tattoo.
• Sometimes when conversing with my mom, she gives me this look...of admiration. Like she's proud of the woman she raised; or she's seeing how though I'm a grown-up, I'm still her baby. I look forward to the day I can look at my child the way my mom looks at me. 
• I love my body...even my slightly knocked knees.
• My grandmother can't remember what she had for breakfast, but oddly remembers a conversation I had about me moving almost a month ago. The human brain is such an interesting organ.  
• The city of Hammond...the county of Lake...the state of Indiana does not believe in salting and properly plowing the streets. It really unpeels my banana, son.
• I miss working downtown. I'm working on getting back there.
• I'm over winter.
• New Orleans...I miss you!
• Toronto...here I come!
• "Now I know how to love somebody/I've learned love is out there for me/There's no way that love forgot/Love won't leave me out."
• Thinking of retiring the "JUKBX" license plate. 
• Yes, having an FWB* can be fun. But that ish gets boring...because it's just sex. I don't want anything more from you...boriiiiiinnnnnng.
• Or is it just me?
• Want to know if a guy who claims to be interested in you is on that shullbit? Ask a male friend. 
• I love how my friends look forward to what has turned into an annual summer party at my crib. But last summer's party was so epic...I don't know if that can be topped. We kicked it from 10p - 4a. My patio was a mess. I had to shampoo my carpet.  

Because, I care.

• I love my team.
• I need my couch reupholstered.
• That wasn't a euphemism. 
• I said I wouldn't give up on Jhene Aiko...and I didn't. She has really grown on me.
• The CFO thanked me for my work on the annual compliance audit at the gig. There were no issues in the audit report that was presented to the audit committee today. It meant a lot to me coming from him.
• December 18, 2014 marks 10 years since I graduated from undergrad. Yikes!
• RIP Whitney Houston

K to the...

*"Friend With Benefits"

J-walking...or something.

As someone who is a lover of fresh kicks, I didn't always have multiple pairs of shoes when growing up. I would get one pair of gym shoes every school year. I never asked my mom for a pair of Air Jordans because I knew damn well she wasn't paying more than $100 for some gym shoes. Plus, they didn't look all that great to me. 

Back in '98, during my sophomore year of high school, our boys' basketball team was the shiznit, mmkay? I remember Quentin Richardson being the first person I saw rocking these particular Js. Like I said before, Js weren't appealing to me...but these young ya digs were the flyest I had seen thus far! And they were in my favorite colors. Seeing those shoes everyday was like being around a married man. I could look...but I damn sure couldn't touch because I knew mom wasn't buying them for me. After a while, I stopped lusting for those shoes.

Fast forward to 2005. Those shoes I loved were retro'ed!

And I HAD to have them.

So at the age of 22, I bought my first pair of Jordans for $100. One of my buddies who worked at a Finishline in Texas shipped them to me.

Damn right, I still got them.

I love the shoes so much, that I got another pair as a gift when they were retro'ed again in 2010. Same style and color. I may have worn them less than 10 times. I'm not ashamed, either.

As of today, I now have 5 pairs of Js. The latest pair are all black Jordan 1s. I searched high and low for some all black kicks (because none of my gyms shoes are in solid colors) and finally found some...and they were only $60. 

*fist pump*

Moral of the story?

There is none.

Happy Monday.

K to the...

"Woke up this morning feeling fresh to def..."

Last Sunday, Jill Scott was in heavy rotation while on the road to take my lil sis back to school. My mom played her first album and while I was singing she was like "This came out during your freshman year at Bradley, right?" It was then that I realized that Jill Scott has been "with me" since I was 17 years old.

"Who is Jill Scott?" dropped on July 18, 2000. I played the hell outta that CD. I mean, hella scratches was on that joint. I remember when I first heard "He Loves Me (Lyzel in E Flat)". I though it was one of the most beautiful songs. That was a love I wanted to (and did, at some point) experience.

Every one of Jill's albums has a song that speaks on what I'm going through at the time the album was released. From "There's Just Me" to "Golden" to "Celibacy Blues" to "Blessed"...Jill be singing my life with her words.

So, here is my personal ranking of Jill's studio albums:

1. Who is Jill Scott? Words and Sounds Vol. 1
2. Light of the Sun
3. The Real Thing: Words and Sounds Vol. 3
4. Beautifully Human: Words and Sounds Vol. 2

Happy Friday!

K to the...

Yogi Chronicles

I've noticed that I don't write much about this "yogi" life of which I am 'bout! Well, let me sauté ON today.

I attended my first hatha yoga class in November 2011. Pure. Struggle. After the first downward dog, I thought "What did I sign up for?" I hated that pose. My instructor, Joanna, said the poses that you hate the most are usually the ones you need. And that pose was the one I needed. My strength has always been, mainly, in my legs. But, now...

*kisses guns*

In September 2012, thanks to a suggestion from a classmate, I signed up for the power yoga (advanced) class. I was skeptical because I didn't want to feel as if I was getting ahead of myself. She saw how I was progressing in hatha and figured I could do it. Though my arms felt like noodles the first 3 weeks of the class, I was glad that I did sign up. 

As of today, I still attend those two classes...err week. In addition to feeling the results of the practice (better breathing, better posture, listening to the body, etc.) I've seen the results. 

Also, being able to hold poses I never thought I'd be able to do is dope, as well.

Not even a horrid Bears game in the background could break my concentration. Swank!

So yeah. My name is K.D.. I am a yogi. I'm 'bout dat life. And hope to be 'bout dat life until I'm 86 like one of my Saturday morning classmates.

Namaste.

K to the...

Lotus

So, I got tattoo #4 this past Friday. After the artist, Ryan, drew the blueprint on my skin, I didn't look down at my stomach until he was finished. It was more beautiful than I anticipated.

Loooooooooooooooooooootus flower bomb. Butterfly.

Why a lotus? 

Word to yogapoint:

The lotus flower grows from the bottom of streams and muddy ponds to rise above the water and bloom. It symbolically represents being fully grounded in earth, yet aspiring towards the divine. At night, the lotus flower closes, and sinks below the water, just to resurface again untouched the next day. The lotus flower is an iconic symbolism of beauty because it lives in the muddy water yet remains unsoiled.

The lotus represents me. I didn't want it to be fully bloomed because I'm forever a work in progress.

So, why the colors?

Red is for myself, representing the strength I've gained mentally, physically, and spiritually. The blue on the inside of the petals represents my mom; her favorite color. The orange on the seed pod represents my grandmother; one of her favorite colors. They'll forever be a part of me. 

So there you have it...tattoo #4 for the 4 (Yip!) born on the 4th. It was the most painful...even more painful than the one on my wrist. All day Saturday, I was walking like I was constipated; looking like I was 9 months pregnant while getting in and out of the car. Pure struggle.

But it was worth it.

Aside from a revamp of my 1st tattoo, I'm done with tattoos. 

I think. 

K to the...

The Jukebox is pleased.

September 2013 has been the month of great album releases. I can't remember the last time I bought this many albums in one month.

Yes, I buy albums.

Below are the albums that have been in rotation this month.

This was released in July, but I finally copped in September.
Pharrell left his mark on this joint.

Electrosophistfunkylady

John is in love...and I am here for it!

I'm a huge fan. I even got my mom hooked on them and my
boo-in-my-head Zo!.

Don't let the OFWGKTA affiliation scare you.
The Internet is a dope group.

So many adjectives have been given to Drake. But what you
WILL NOT call him is "inconsistent".

Part 2 has a different feel than Part 1. Timbo stay killing it!

Happy Friday!

K to the...

Look at God!

Yesterday morning, my mother called me while at work.  Her voice was calm...but it was an unusual calm. 

“I just had a gun pointed at me.”

She was standing outside of her job, talking on the phone with a family friend.  Two guys walked by her.  She continues her phone conversation.  Moments later, she hears a voice behind her.  She turns around, and it’s one of the dudes, face covered…gun pointed at her face.  She screamed and immediately ran back inside of her job.

My mom works at an adult day center in the neighborhood she grew up in.

The neighborhood I grew up in.

The neighborhood my grandmother STILL lives in.

Yesterday was my grandfather's 77th birthday.

During our long embrace, she said

"My dad had my back today."

Yes, he did.

K to the...

#31WriteNow Day 11 - Laugh

*I tweeted about this the other day.  If you read the tweets, just act like this is your first time reading.  If you didn't...enjoy."

On Day 7, I wrote about my grandmother's condition and how I won't be going into much detail about her challenges on my blog.  At the end of the post is a pic of me kissing my grandmother's cheek.  Every time I look at it, I smile because of what happened prior to that picture being taken.  It's become one of my favorite photos with her.

About 3 weeks ago, a gang of us were at my best friend's parents' crib celebrating my "other mom's" birthday.  We were all sitting around, talking, sipping, dancing...just having a good time.  Mei-Mei called me over to sit down next to her.  She was feeling good that night.  She had her Moscato AND took a shot or two of tequila.

Yep.  She was feeling good.

After I sat down, I asked her to take a picture with me.  She told me she didn't like the first picture.  Then, she starts laughing.  As she started to laugh, I took this pic:

While she continued to laugh, I kissed her cheek and caught that moment.  Here it is again...and you will deal.  I really do love this pic:

Love.

Happy Sunday.

K to the...

*sigh*

People have been crossing the line lately when it comes to my relationship. I mean, putting their nose all up in my business when I didn't ask. And this morning, I got even more irritated.

If I'm on wikipedia reading about a celebrity and their wedding picture is showing in their biography...that doesn't mean I'm thinking about marriage.

If I'm googling Usher's tattoos, tryna get a closer look at them...that doesn't mean I'm looking at pics of my boyfriend.
**He doesn't even look like Usher. And why would I google photos of my boyfriend...at work?**

I'm currently searching for an apt because I refuse to renew my lease in Baby Stateway Gardens...that doesn't mean that we are moving in together.

If we spend a splendiferous weekend together...that doesn't mean I'm, now, engaged. Excuse me if my great-grandmother's ring (which doesn't look sheeit like an engagement ring) fits better on my left hand's ring finger.

I don't know if he goes through this insinuating shullbit that I go through, but it seems like I do, on a weekly basis! I'm tired of it. It's like maugs are reaching!

Well, ya arms are too short to box with God...or something like that.

I'm extremely happy, and I don't feel I have to constantly tell everyone that. The ones I'm close to know how I feel about him; he knows how I feel about him. He and those people are the only ones that matter.

So, the moral of the story this blogpost?

MIND YOUR DAMN BUSINESS!

Worry about YOUR relationships...or lack of.

Use that button at the upper right hand corner of your phone labeled "Fall Back,"* Jabroni!

K to the...

*Borrowed :-)

30 Day Challenge: #23 The last person you kissed

Dear _____,

In response to that text you sent at 9:34 am today...

Me too! :-)

Tips on a tightrope,

K to the...

Tactful Tuesday

Ay!

Stop looking at me like that!

Yeah, I know...it's been a while.

*hangs head in shame*

But today a certain "Thought of The Week" we used to read in h.s. freshman year came to mind and I thought I'd share it with you guys.

If any of my readers had Ms. Sharpe, then you know ALL about this

“The longer I live, the more I realize the impact of attitude on life.
Attitude, to me, is more important than facts.
It is more important than the past,
the education,
the money,
than circumstances,
than failure,
than successes,
than what other people think or say or do.
It is more important than appearance, giftedness or skill.
It will make or break a company...
a church...
a home.
The remarkable thing is we have a choice everyday regarding the attitude we will embrace for that day.
We cannot change our past...
we cannot change the fact that people will act in a certain way.
We cannot change the inevitable.
The only thing we can do is play on the one string we have,
and that is our attitude.
I am convinced that life is 10% what happens to me and 90% of how I react to it.
And so it is with you...
we are in charge of our Attitudes.”

~Charles R. Swindoll

Have a good one everyone!

K to the...